Diary of a Dog: Teddi

Photos by Irene Searles

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My name is Teddi. Teddi Baer. I was named by the younger humans in my family, Naomi and Ilana, who decided that because my last name is Baer, I just had to be called Teddi. (Other suggestions at the time were Sugar and Honey.) I also live with Doug and Sheri, who happens to be PUNCH’s editorial director—which may have helped my chances to tell you about my day.

I’m what’s known as a Labradoodle but my family says I’m more like a cartoon character because I’m always so goofy. I don’t know why they say that about me because I take my role in our household very seriously. My number-one job is protecting our property from squirrel invaders. If I spot any sign of critters, I dart out the back door, circle a redwood tree and then run the entire fence line to scare them off. I’m also on guard duty inside the house. When animals attempt to breach this glowing box in our living room, I growl and bark and even scratch at the screen to chase them away. Nothing gets through—not even the green gecko who’s always talking about insurance.

My favorite outing is hiking, and my favorite place is Fort Funston because I don’t have to keep my humans on their leash. I especially love racing Doug up the sand dunes because I always win. I also love playing with my best friend, Rica, even though she is much better at chasing balls than I am. Although I’m exhausted at the end of the day, I always execute a perfect final doodle flop. This entails jutting my arms and legs straight out like I’m stretching with a torso twist in the middle and a head turn on top. It’s a high-skill maneuver best left to us pros.